NFL Week 9 survivor picks

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Last week was about as straightforward as it gets in survivor pools, with 13 of 15 favorites winning - the Buffalo Bills (-1) and Chicago Bears (-3.5) being the only exceptions.

You would've had to pull a pretty reckless move to be eliminated; the kind of brashness Ron Burgundy displayed when he jumped into the Kodiak bear pit at the San Diego Zoo.

Safest pick: Buffalo Bills

Here's a pick you won't regret.

The Bills might be a plastic 5-2, but for our purposes, they fit the bill. Sean McDermott's team is coming off an ugly loss to the Philadelphia Eagles that should have many questioning the legitimacy of its record, but if there's one thing the Bills have done with implacable consistency, it's beat worse teams worse than them.

All five of Buffalo's wins have come against teams that will be picking high in April's draft - the New York Jets, New York Giants, Cincinnati Bengals, Tennessee Titans (pre-Ryan Tannehill), and Miami Dolphins. The 1-7 Washington Redskins would slot seamlessly into that list.

The Bills' third-ranked defense is a nightmarish matchup for a Redskins offense that ranks 30th in the NFL in yards and points per game and has committed 14 turnovers. Washington head coach Bill Callahan still doesn't know who will start at quarterback this week after Case Keenum missed the second half of last week's contest against the Minnesota Vikings with a concussion.

Washington's season has gotten progressively worse this season, with Keenum one of the main culprits. After throwing for five touchdowns and no interceptions in the first two weeks, he's posted four touchdowns and seven turnovers in five starts since. Now he's on the road against Buffalo's defense, which limited Tom Brady to 150 yards and an interception.

Should Keenum be deemed unfit to play, Dwayne Haskins would fill in under center. My heart goes out to the Redskins and their fans if that's the case. Early returns suggest Haskins is absolutely not an NFL quarterback. He ran a simplified one-read offense at Ohio State and, surprise surprise, it has resulted in an inability to read defenses at the NFL level. He has four interceptions in 22 career pass attempts - a higher rate than Nathan Peterman.

If you're feeling lucky: Philadelphia Eagles

After beating those lowly Redskins in Week 3, the Chicago Bears have gone 1-3 and find themselves in crisis. Mitch Trubisky posted three touchdowns and an 80.6 completion percentage against Washington but has been an unmitigated disaster since. The offense is a trainwreck and their kicking issues, which appeared to be a thing of the past, have since resurfaced.

It's not hyperbole to suggest Chicago's season hung in the balance this past weekend when Eddy Pineiro stepped up with a chance at a 41-yard game-winning field goal as time expired. A successful kick would have weathered the storm, pushed the Bears above .500, and kept them in the NFC playoff race.

Pineiro missed because these are the Bears and water is wet.

Now, this dejected Chicago team has to travel to Philadelphia for a game against a rejuvenated Eagles squad that was backed into a corner in Week 8 and came out swinging, salvaging its season and halting its tailspin with a signature win in Buffalo. These teams are heading in opposite directions, and it seems there's one way for this game to play out. Carson Wentz will lift the Eagles to 5-4, while Trubisky and the Bears slump to 3-5, effectively eliminating them from playoff contention.

Avoid: Seattle Seahawks

The 6-2 Seattle Seahawks host the 2-5 Tampa Bay Buccaneers this weekend, and on the surface, a straightforward Seattle victory seems to be in the cards. But how good are the Seahawks, really?

They've underwhelmed in one-score victories over the Bengals, Pittsburgh Steelers, Los Angeles Rams, Cleveland Browns, and Atlanta Falcons. They've won by more than seven points just once this season - against the Arizona Cardinals. In their two losses, they were blown out by the New Orleans Saints and Baltimore Ravens. I'm not sold on this team, and you shouldn't be either. We'll learn a lot more about them over the second half of the season, and it starts this week against the Buccaneers.

Tampa Bay has been as unpredictable a team as any over the past few seasons. This year alone, it lost at home to the Giants but beat the Carolina Panthers and Rams on the road. The Bucs visited New Orleans and went blow-for-blow against the Saints in a one-score loss - the same Saints who won handily in Seattle. They're the grab bag of NFL franchises.

Much of that volatility stems from quarterback Jameis Winston, who has as many games with three interceptions as he does with three touchdowns. The only thing consistent about Winston is his inconsistency. At this point, the only conceivable explanation is that he visited the same spa as Paul Rudd and is splitting starts with his enhanced clone.

The best option is to avoid this game altogether. Play with fire, and you might get burned.

Week 9 safety ranking

Safety rankings (SR) are out of 10 based on the author's picks

* Game played in London

Alex Moretto is a sports betting writer for theScore. A journalism graduate from Guelph-Humber University, he has worked in sports media for over a decade. He will bet on anything from the Super Bowl to amateur soccer, is too impatient for futures, and will never trust a kicker. Find him on Twitter @alexjmoretto.